Lovingheart

On Thursday, we dropped Marlon off at outdoor school and Mina likes that time.  Lots of kids to give her attention and play chase with her.  When it was time to go, she didn't want to leave but that afternoon we went for a walk with Stella and she liked that too. Stella is fast and strong and Mina can't keep up but since then the two of them have had a few walks together and are creating a relationship.  Nice to see. Hard to see but in this picture, Mina has a big snowball. Marlon sometimes complains when he does too much but little by little he can do more and more.  He gets these waves of exhaustion but recovers quickly.

Marlon needed Wednesday to recover from Tuesday's hospital visit but since then he has been pretty good.  He hasn't thrown up since Tuesday morning and is relieved to not be dealing with constant nausea. We went to the Santa Claus parade on Saturday and while Mina was just fine, I think she would have been just as happy to not be there.  I am happy that she likes people.  She picked a few favourites at the parade and if she felt nervous she would stand closer to them. Sunday, I took her for a longer walk than we usually do and a little while later we joined Josephine and Stella for another walk.  I was happy Marlon came along and we went a route that he hasn't done since the spring when he needed help to get back.  It is nice to see the two dogs getting more comfortable around each other and playing. Today, we went to my sister's place and walked with her and her dog.  Mina tries to keep up with the older dogs and while she is stronger and faster, she can't...

While Marlon's back was still a little sore this morning, he decided he would go to outdoor school. Before I left for work, I gave Mina a special bone. I laughed at her cigar.  Moments after this, the cat hissed at her, she dropped her bone and came to hide by me.  He still terrorizes her.  At bedtime, I will sit at the opening of her crate with her until she decides she is ok going in.  I often give her a nudge.  The other day as we were by the crate, and she was showing no signs of heading in until the cat came up from behind and hissed.  Immediately she was in the crate as far back as she could go.  Cat and dog…

Marlon was much better today than yesterday.  His head was ok but his back still achy and sore so he didn't do too much. We regularly have some good laughs together.  The other day, he took a bowl of water and a handful of grapes, dipping each one individually in the water before eating.  I asked why he didn't wash them together at the sink.  He said something about the lazy way to do it.  At one point, he splashed some water and had to clean it up.  Later, as I was doing the dishes, I asked him to hand me the bowl.  He grabbed it and lifted, forgetting it was full and making a big splash and watery mess. We both had a good laugh and I think next time he will just wash the handful in the sink. I was figuring out how many squares of chocolate we would need for a brownie recipe and I said we'd need 28; 4x8.  He gave me this incredulous look and we both laughed at my math error. Mina likes to play chase, we chase her or she chases us with her teeth c...

Hospital day today.  When we have to leave early, I get up at 430 to get ready.  This morning, I opened Mina's crate, she came out said 'good morning', had a cuddle, yawned loudly a few times, and walked back in her crate to sleep some more.  I agreed and wished I could crawl back into bed. It was when we were leaving that she was ready to play and it was hard to walk away but apparently her day was fine. The hospital appointment went well and afterward Marlon and I went to Guelph.  He dropped some cookies off at friends and they walked to the park and hung out for a bit. This evening though was a very rough one.  The worst reaction he has had to a lumbar puncture.  His back was quite sore, his head hurt so bad he couldn't function or sleep and he was plain miserable.  Eventually, it eased up enough he could consider getting horizontal. This picture was taken this morning before we left and we weren't surprised to see it lying down when we got home. Mi...

Both Marlon and Mina are better and stronger. Marlon threw up several days in a row.  Either upon waking or in the evening or both.  After speaking with the nurse, once I finally got his anti-nausea pills, it seems he has acid reflux.  Apparently not uncommon, especially in the older kids.   Now that he is taking something for that, he is much better and not feeling nauseous so much. Mina has not been thrilled by her food so we have been playing around with that.  The cat sure likes her food and when she is eating, he will come along, scare her away, and eat the dog's food.  Mina is quite scared of Mojo and the cat has lashed out at the dog a few times.  Just now, I was sitting on the floor with the dog nearby.  The cat came along, hissed and growled, and Mina climbed into my lap. Overall, Mina is stronger and has more energy and is running, playing, and can make it up the front steps with more ease.  The toy Marlon made for her. While the ca...

'It's kind of sad.  I've thrown up so many times, you don't even react anymore.  You just keep doing what you were doing.' Spoken by Marlon this morning.   He did go on to have a good day.  Fairly good.  Grounders at the park but he felt harassed by a girl.  She is a little older and was sort of 'in charge' and in the two times they've met, it hasn't been the best for M.  He felt picked on. Mina and I had a nice walk with friends while playground games were happening. I have been asking Marlon to make Mina a toy using paracord.  This evening, I thought he was finally making one for her but when he was done he told me it was a bracelet for himself.  Maybe tomorrow. Picture from when Linsy was here.  She brought us Montreal bagels and one cut in half became a heart.

Our days have been pretty full which is a good thing. Mina is getting stronger.  Sometimes she acts like the puppy she is and then is in recovery for a while.  Marlon is similar.  He runs out of steam faster than some. Friday, my sister Olivia and her husband, Jamey, moved closer to us than they were before.  We stopped by that evening to deliver some blankets and today saw the place in daylight.  Seven people and three dogs had a nice walk around the property. Nearing the end of the walk, Marlon was feeling it.  Mina kept up but it was a lot for her as well.   Louise, Marlon's hospital driver, lives close to Olivia's house so she and her husband Paul stopped by.  Nice to see her and my sister has met a neighbour. Mina is happy in the cooler weather and had some nice white highlights from the snow the other day. This morning, I was woken by Marlon calling 'bucket', so I ran and got him his container and he promptly threw up.  He threw up...

I didn't cry as Linsy was leaving until I saw the dog's reaction.  Mina just sat by the door, long after Linsy had gone away in the car, looking sad and dejected.  I sat with her and cried.  And I continued weeping and crying throughout the day.  My tears well up even as I write this. Part of my sadness was the dog and how she wanted to be with Linsy. I notice once again how my low self-esteem has me believe she would rather be with that one person than the four of us here.  I turned her bonding with Linsy into a rejection of myself. It was nice to have Linsy here and she managed to spend time with each of her brothers individually, with friends, her boyfriend, and more.  I am sad to see her go again yet I think her life in Montreal is right for her at this time. This afternoon, Marlon and I had a nice walk with Mina.  A path I haven't walked with Marlon in quite a while.  It was nice and the dog enjoyed it too.

Happy Halloween! Grateful that this year Marlon was well enough to go out trick-or-treating. During Linsy's visit, this was the one day our family could have dinner together.  Then Linsy, Mina, Marlon, and I went out and walked the streets.  Once again, Mina amazed me.  She trotted along with us, following Marlon to most front doors.  Nothing seemed to scare her. Mina is not very strong and can't always go up and down the front steps of the house.  She has limited energy and lately that has been even more apparent.  Linsy and I were surprised to see her keep up, even going up and down some stairs, though closer to the end she just put her front paws on the first step.  After a couple of streets boy and dog were done and so happy to get home and rest.

A group of us had a Halloween walk in Elora yesterday.  I wasn't sure how it would go with Mina and imagined I would end up having to carry her most of the way.  I was surprised that she happily trotted along with us.  She was a little nervous but was ok with people and traffic.  At home, she normally stays close by, without leash or collar, and hasn't walked too well when leashed up. In the car, she is happy to rest on Marlon. Linsy's friend came along for the walk as well and Linsy was happy to get the chance to catch up with her. I'll need to keep a close eye on Linsy and Mina otherwise Linsy will head back to Montreal with the dog who will willingly follow her wherever.  In just a short time they have such a strong bond.  Mina adores Linsy. It is nice to have Linsy around and I could easily get used to it again.  It is hard for Linsy though as she has the appeal of being back here and isn't sure where home is right now.  This home is a holiday...

  This was all ready to send last night and then Linsy came home!  I hadn't seen her in a couple of months.  So nice to spend time with her. October 28, 2021 After throwing up tonight, Marlon was saying he has kind of gotten used to it.  He went on to say he figures in the last year, he has thrown up more times than all of us combined.  Entirely possible.  The medication still affects him. Today, I took Mina to see her brother and mom.  She was happy to see her birth family again and play with her brother.  Her dog mom was jealous of the attention she got from her human birth mom.

Marlon had an appointment for orthotics today.  Though I left plenty of time, we were late.  One wrong turn after another.  A place in Hamilton we haven't been to before and I don't know how many times I turned the wrong way, missed a turn, took a wrong one, and turned around.  In the end, once we finally drove past the building, which is on a one-way street, and we were on the wrong side, I just found parking on the street and we walked. It reminded me of the day of his diagnosis when I first drove him to MacMaster.  Full of such frazzled emotions, the closer we got, the slower I drove.  Then I was following the big 'H' signs until they stopped and we were on a residential street in Hamilton.  Eventually, I got us turned around and we found our way. Today, I was ready for this appointment and feel something needs to be done before Marlon has other, compensation problems. The orthopedic doctor checked Marlon's legs and fitted him for a brace for his le...

I got an email from Jason at Amazon saying the email I received was a mistake and I will get a refund.  I laughed and cried and raged.  All that stress, chaos, the many emails, the phone calls, and they claim it was a mistake.  That shows what can be accomplished when you raise a stink.  Let's just sweep this under that carpet… Sometimes when Mina is eating, Mojo will come along, hiss and growl, and the dog will step away from her food.  She will go hide by me or leave the room.  The cat will start eating the dog's food.  I will often let him eat a little under the belief that if he can see a benefit to having the dog here, he may soften up (I know, wishful thinking). This evening, Marlon and I were on the floor, playing cards, playing with Mina, and trying not to get bitten by her.  I noticed a different bump on her back.  As soon as I felt it, alarm bells went off.  We looked and weren't sure.  Brought Mina to Thomas to look at wi...

Mina and Stella, Josephine's dog, have slowly been getting to know each other.  Little bits here and there.  At first, Mina was quite afraid.  Now, as long as Stella isn't barking too much or too loud, she wags her tail and they share sniffs.  Mina wants to play but when Stella joins in, she gets nervous.  Interesting to watch the process of gaining trust between the two dogs.  As far as the Amazon scam is concerned, I received an email from the Account Services saying that Jeff Bezos received my email.  They ask for a week to look into it, so I'll sit back and see what happens before pursuing other avenues. Marlon is happy to be without cast or brace.  I believe he has been on the computer a fair the past couple of days so not doing too much physical activity, however, he has enjoyed a decent amount of Minecraft with friends.

After my cry for help about getting scammed by Amazon, I received much support and many ideas, some of which I have started following.  I did get an email from Amazon that sounds like it may be a human.  We'll see where that goes. Hospital visit this morning for Marlon at the fracture clinic.  The doctor recommended using the brace at times when Marlon is being more active or playing, otherwise, his arm is free.  What a relief, as anyone who has ever had a cast knows. Wednesday, the day after the chemo/LP hospital visit is often a lower day for Marlon but those lows are getting higher.  In other words, he seems to be recovering better.  After this visit, Marlon has started another round of steroids so both dog and boy are taking them. Mina does have another sore that is oozing but her energy levels are good and she is a pretty happy puppy.  She is sensitive and does best if she is treated gently.  I accidentally kicked her (not hard at all) and sh...

I have been scammed by Amazon.  I lost $576! My son bought a used truck.  It needed a new bumper. He looked all over, it looked like it would cost over $1000 and take weeks to get here (none in wrecking yards that he found). Lo and behold Amazon had exactly what he needed for just over $500 and we could get it in a couple of days. We ordered it and as soon as the box arrived I was suspicious.  How could a bumper fit in a box this size? Size 7 woman's shoe on box. Turns out it was a tow hitch.  We contacted Amazon and returned it.  A while later, I received an email saying we did not return a bumper so we will not get a refund ($576 including tax). I have emailed them back many, many times and I have called several times.  I called the bank to dispute the charge and they need an expert letter but I need the product to get that and, according to Amazon, the product I received and subsequently returned has been discarded. Amazon calls the case resolved and I a...

My dad was in WWII and often considered himself lucky.  Lucky that he was a prisoner of war at this camp rather than another.  Lucky he went in this line rather than that line.  And I suppose he was lucky because he survived and went on to live a full, rich life.  I am sure the experience may have scarred him but he chose to see it in a positive light and an opportunity for growth. And in the past year, I have been so aware of good fortune as well.  Sure it may be a bumpy, scary road but when I see and hear of what some others are dealing with, especially within the oncology ward, it is easy to see we have been lucky. Visits to the hospital are a sobering, humbling experience and I am usually affected for days afterward, thinking of the people I may have seen or spoken with. The long line of bravery beads slung on a backpack, the cry of a baby, the sweet, verbal two-year-old, and so much more… This morning, Marlon kept repeating how lucky we are that we got the ...

It's early morning, not quite 6 am, I am puttering away in the kitchen, with the dog nearby chewing on her bone.  I hear a rumbling and think it is too early for the construction to start already.  Then I realize the cat has walked into the room.  He growls a little more, hisses, then leaves the room. Mina really wants to be given a chance.  She was actually sitting in front of the chair watching him sleep.  Sometimes she will cower in the face of his growls, sometimes she will just sit and watch, gently wagging her tail. On the plus side, she is much better.  I had stopped giving her the steroids for the strangles disease on Friday as it should have been enough time.  I guess it wasn't. After just one dose on Monday, she started to perk up again.  The sores are not weeping and she is more mischievous and ready for occasional play.  She'll stay on the steroids a while longer. Marlon had a hospital appointment today.  Chemo and LP (sedati...

What an emotionally exhausting day!  I am listening to a book by Brene Brown which has me feeling emotion.  I was at work on the till with the malfunctioning scale.  I was dealing with it but then an hour and fifteen minutes into my shift, I was sent on my first break.  I felt triggered by that.  Just one thing after another with emotions tumbling.  I made a mistake with a customer and she called into the store to complain, thinking I may have been trying to steal from her.  Also heard yesterday of a suicide from someone I have known through the store.  And another person is still struggling.  Just so much, so many emotions. I got home at 640, Mina was on her blanket, and there was food in her bowl.  She wasn't eating supper??  Then Marlon told me it was her lunch and I felt even worse.  Apparently, she had not been doing well, hardly able to stand.  Marlon and I hugged and cried.  He went into this thing that he gets...