January 17, 2021

-

Being in the hospital is hard in part, because we are surrounded by so much suffering.  Parents are there with their kids, doing their best, but so often the kids are in pain, uncomfortable, or very, very sick.  The screams of the little ones.  Sometimes it is just fear.  The nurses and doctors can signify discomfort.  Some know to appreciate the doctors and nurses.

I spoke with the mom of a three-year-old boy.  I don't remember what kind of cancer but it is all throughout his body.  They are new to the journey.  Two and a half weeks in, though she spent a month trying to get answers on what was wrong with her son.  And I wonder how it will be.  Will he be able to recover?  

I remember the early days, the questions, the concerns, and the feeling of being in over my head.

Now, I feel more comfortable.  I see how much better Marlon is and how it looks very promising that he will recover and live a healthy, normal life.  Not everyone is so lucky and it hurts.

Years ago, I made an unconscious decision to avoid physical pain.  With that decision, I caused myself much emotional, and then physical pain too.  We can't avoid it.  Pain is a part of the human existence.  Because of Marlon's diagnosis, we are the lucky recipients of so much love and support.  I do hope that anyone and everyone can remember there is always love and support to be had.

Marlon had a pretty good day, not feeling great but all things considered, he was good.  We made paper airplanes and flew them outside but it doesn't take long for them to get soggy in the snow, and for us to get cold without mitts. His Kiwico kit was waiting for him when we got back from the hospital. He put it together. It is a parabolic microphone and can pick up quiet sounds from several feet away.  I made a sound too close to it when he had the headphones in and hurt his ears. Yikes. 

He made it through the day until later in the evening when he started to feel sick.  Just before bed, he threw up. I trust he will sleep well and feel much better in the morning.

This painting was not made by one of us but it is one that Marlon chose years ago and I feel the strength of it for him.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

November 10, 2022 (2)

-
Image
Today, I dropped Marlon off at outdoor school and met up with a friend I have only seen a handful of times in the last 20+ years.  She was in the area for the passing of a family member. i then went for a walk with Mina.  I watched and she poised herself in hunting position and pounced.  I saw a squirrel run up a tiny little tree but also heard this pitiful whining.  At first, confused, I wondered if she had pounced on a nest in the ground.  But the dog ran to me, crying and whining, holding up her paw.  We were a ways from home and she hobbled carefully home after we sat for a while and she calmed down.  She will often run the perimeter of fields, running this way and that.  I saw her longing to run the field as we made our way back but she was uncomfortable and limping. A short while later, I went to pick up Marlon and watched in amazement as he hobbled to the car.  Yes, he had hurt his foot within an hour of the dog hurting herself.  Both boy and dog are limping.  Just as they were
Read more

July 7, 2022

-
Image
On May 23rd, the week before the chemo that weakened Marlon enough to put him in the hospital, the dog, the boy, and I drove to Montreal. (I am aware of the use of the word 'go' when writing. In German, the verb 'to go' means walking. You don't 'go' in a car.) Before we left, as I was packing up the car, I noticed a fair sized spider web between the driver's side view mirror and the car. I left it alone, figuring the wind would blow it off. It was so nice to see Linsy and Moira and spend time with them. I have missed having Linsy around. It was neat that, when we got there, Olivia, Jamey, and Roka, their dog, were there. They live 15 minutes away from us but were there visiting their son. Mina was definitely happy to see Roka (and all the others too).   Mina got used to walking on sidewalks and being in the city. Other people and dogs, not so much. Moira has given me a belt with a dog lead on it for hands-free walking. It worked but was even bett
Read more

July 5, 2022

-
Image
Decision was made that Marlon was to go check blood counts on Monday.  We drove down to Hamilton together, quick finger poke, and then leave again.  A couple of times, we drove around the parking garage for almost a half-hour looking for a spot, but Monday was smooth.  Busy place. Blood counts are good so dental work begins.  Marlon's doctor was impressed with the dentist when she spoke with him last week.  In support, I sit next to him in the dentist's room and hope my own anxiety, discomfort, and fear don't affect him. Halfway through the drilling of four teeth which was quite intense, they took a little break to check in with Marlon and see if he was up to continue.  He agreed to do more but said he was most concerned about the tastes of the filling material.  With the pain and discomfort of the first part, one would think that would be the least of his worries but he is very sensitive to taste and flavour.  As it turned out he didn't gag or react too strongly so I g
Read more