Talking Back

LB has started to undo the top portion of her car seat while the car is moving and lift herself up with her arms, turn around to look behind us, reach forward to open the window and all sorts of things she isn’t ‘supposed’ to do.

Today I noticed her doing these things (all of the above) and I asked her to sit still in her seat and sit back. She continued to lift herself up so I said ‘LINSY!!’ in a stern way with my voice slightly raised. I don’t know if she changed her position or not but she said to me ‘Don’t yell at me!... Yell at Paco.’ Right – what am I supposed to say to that? I just laughed to myself and ignored her for the short bit that was left of the trip.

Not terribly consistent I suppose. Asking her to do something and then ignoring her when she ignores my requests. This kind of back-talk really gets me. Personally how do I feel about the issue? Do I feel it’s worth getting into a fight about? How am I willing to persist or have my requests be honored? Another work in progress – I imagine my style of parenting will be continuing to grow and change and I continue to learn and change…

Comments

Anonymous said…
I find "back talk" very difficult. And I find it easy to get caught up in, because I have a child who will ask "Why?" and I'll answer, and that just opens the door to a whole bunch of reasons of his in opposition to what I've said... If the issue is a matter of safety, I'll "take him on". But if it isn't, don't I want him to have his own opinions?

Sigh. I want a manual!
Lovingheart said…
Ya a manual would be great but knowing me I wouldn't follow it word for word anyway.

It is hard - not wanting to override their innate sense of individuality and not wanting to feel 'overridden'. And then of course just feeling 'why'd' out.

I was feeling rather disheartened this evening with the whole parenting stuff and everything else that goes along with it (all the other relationships in my life).

Apparently we do this to ourselves?

Shera

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