Kids as mirrors

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I‘m sure I have written before about the challenges of watching my children take on issues that are painful to me. I have many a memory of feeling like an outcast and not fitting in. Heck, these are not only distant past memories but quite current as well.

I struggle with my emotions and sense of inadequacy as I see my kids not able to fit in with the group. Whether it is a smaller group of just a couple of other kids or a larger group we just don’t seem to have a way fitting in.

Kids are our mirrors are they not? If there’s an issue that is ripe and ready for healing no doubt some relationship will bring it front and centre. No wonder it is often our kids as they are likely our main relationship (along with our parenting partners). I know there are times where I can wish to be far away and not have to deal with myself. How ridiculous does that sound? If I am not with those I am in deep relationship with then I am also not with myself? Not likely! Brings about the mistaken idea that we can run away from situations by changing them. If there is something that needs healing then just changing those that put it ‘in our face’ is not going to solve the problem.

Just knowing this does not stop me from wanting to change it now and forever. Why can’t it just be different? What can I do to change this NOW? I just want the uncomfortable feelings to be over with but it may not be that simple. Perhaps they are there for a reason. Perhaps there is a lesson to be learned. Hmmm – brings it back to patience again. Bring it on…

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