Is Today Tomorrow?

This is a phrase that Paco would often use. It took me a while to understand what it meant (I guess I'm the dense one here). In his attempt to figure out this world and what any given day was, tomorrow was just another day of the week. Tomorrow is what we were planning for yesterday. My response to him was “ Today is the tomorrow of yesterday.” (or something like that.) Linsy's version of this is “When is tomorrow?”

I was thinking of this today as I was listening to the kids playing/living (heck their life is a game). Paco woke up from his sleep and said “It's tomorrow!”.

A lot of the kids' play/life right now is centered around work. Their phone is ringing off the hook with calls for them to work. They have many jobs and are working so much that they are very busy (well in theory anyway). Their calendar is always having something else added to the days. Often they use symbols to express the given job but Paco is also appreciating writing and often asks how to spell words.

This is just another example of how their play is processing of their life. Things are different for them now as I am working many hours out of the house. Wake in the morning and eat and prepare food for the day then work and come home in the evening, put the kids to bed, eat and again prepare food for the following day. It's all about work.

Their assorted jobs are school crossing guard, working at the restaurant, the post office and various stores. Their current job is mopping and then clearing the table in the kitchen (yes for real they decided to work for me). Of course our real combined job is delivering papers.

Our lives are always changing and some phases run smoother than others.

Left and Right

Interestingly enough I am dealing with carpal tunnel in my left hand. I am not sure why it is here but it sure is making me pay attention to how I use my hands. Is there any area where I predominantly use my left hand more than my right? The big one is using a knife to cut food in the kitchen. There are other things like brushing my teeth and cleaning the toilets but of course that isn't too much. I have been doing a lot of shoveling and though one side is definitely easier to use than the other, I do try to balance out how much I use each side.

One thing I really notice is how my body works together. Each side has its specialty. One hand holds the blender the other one handles the spatula. One hand holds the dishes the other one holds the cloth. Ya know simple things that you just don't normally pay attention to.

A newfound appreciation for all the things my body does without even paying attention. And I suppose that attention to those things that are often done on automatic pilot is also a good thing.

A good night is one where I can get some sleep and the pain of the hand/arm isn't keeping me awake and having me try many different positions. Something else to pay attention to...

Work blocks and the Now

I have experienced many instances of late about blockages and things not moving smoothly. A lot of these relate to work or finding work that pays well. And I can see that I hold onto resistance to work. Do what works. What works best in my life is hanging out with the kids and our activities.

There are times when we are doing whatever and I feel so grateful to be with them and having the opportunity to do what we do. Simple things like hanging outside and shoveling the snow in the middle of the day. Hanging outside and doing our own thing. Off on a little excursion of some sort. Many times I will feel such gratitude to be able to do these things.

But the need to be bringing in more money is current in our life. And the possibility of full time work looms ahead. How – just how – would I deal with that? In a life where I often feel a lack of freedom just what would that do to me? What would that do to life as I know it? What would that do to just hanging out with the kids? What would that do to our activities and excursions? What would that do to my life? It sure would change.

So there have been blocks that have appeared in my path of finding work and no wonder about that.

Now there is a job here for me that pays very little and the hours are looming ahead. And the internal distress is great. And the me that wants to organize these activities with the kids and sign up for the excursions is unable to plan. The days and hours seem to be too full as it is. How will I survive? How much will I have to give up?

And time will tell...

I just wrote about past disagreements affecting our now and here is an example of future fears affecting the now as well. Isn't life wonderful?!?

Disagreements and the Now

The kids have many a disagreement everyday. Some are bigger than others but it does seem that regardless of how 'big' the disagreement there will be many screams. Linsy is a screamer. And oh how she screams – she is loud, she is shrill, and she is persistent. If there is something she wants there is little that she lets stand in her way. Including her brother or parents. If he has something she wants she will take it or scream until the windows rattle and her brother gives said item to her. Or her parents plead with her brother to give her said item or 'work something out'.

Paco has his share of temper tantrums around their disagreements as well.

One thing with their disagreements though is that they likely won't last too long. In a short period of time they have sorted things out and are happily onto the next event or activity. And for Thomas and I the hard part is keeping up with them. I am still reeling from the screaming and tears and disagreement but they are happily into something else. They are in the now and they are moving fast. I am caught up in what has happened and ruminating over it all but they are not.

The power of now is so great – it is all that really exists for us and yet I see how, as adults, we are much slower moving that we used to be. Our past is much greater and more complex than that of a child. And yet there has to be a way to participate in life with the speed of a child. To move onto the next event without allowing two minute old disagreements (or two year or twenty year ones) keep us back.

So I'm here now but I am writing about the past. I am learning from the past. Humph... And right now there are no disagreements. There is only the freedom of now.

NAET and allergies

Last year before Christmas Monique and her two kids came by for some cookie baking. Before long Mds was having an allergic reaction to the cats that we have. He was sneezing almost non-stop, his breathing was not clear, he was getting hives and his eyes were very runny. I gave him a mega c drink (3-4 grams of C), and things calmed down enough for him to stay for a while longer. It didn't take long before his reactions became more severe and again a c drink calmed things down but they didn't stay long after that. His hives popped out quite a bit once they were home and it took a while for him to recover from being at our place for a couple of hours. Other times in contact with cats the c didn't work that well.

It was at the point that we limited the kids seeing each other as even being in the vicinity of us (the two boys sitting on the couch together at their place) was enough for him to react to the cats on our clothes.

The summer before I had felt so bad for him as he was sniffling with puffy and runny eyes due to seasonal allergies. He would be running and playing and 'suffering' (though I really think at that age – 5 – it just is the way things are and they don't view it as much as suffering as we might – or as I did).

Many food allergies and sensitivities also affected his daytoday life (though we do learn to adapt to those and again it just is the way things are).

Then they started up with NAET treatments. I was surprised with the ease of this summer for him. We didn't see them all that often but Mds was not suffering being outside. He could run and play and wasn't always stopping for remedies and nose-blowing and all that.

I was so impressed at the changes.

Last week they came by for a visit. First time they had been to our place in over a year. Before they arrived ds was berating dd for letting the cat inside – he remembered the allergies. It didn't matter. They were here for over two hours. He was not sniffling, he sneezed less than a handful of times over the course of the visit, and he was able to play quite a bit without over-exerting himself.

We had these rice crackers that had wheat containing soy sauce on them (we tend to avoid gluten just because but have no real need to ingest it) and he was able to eat them. Before he had to be very careful about all contact with gluten as he would react (hives and puffy eyes at least).

I am inspired and impressed by the changes I have witnessed - seems to be a good thing. I do suppose that, as with anything else, the practitioner is also a key factor in having good results.

Hanging out with bird and cat

We have a 'pet grouse'. This bird has been hanging around for a while and is getting more and more friendly with us. Kind of neat to have a wild bird hanging around and coming up close. He likes corn and has no problem eating it out of hand. I was taking pictures of him the other day and I was having a hard time being far enough away from him. I would step away and he would step forward.

And what a chatterbox Mr Grouse is. He always has a lot to say – even while eating.

There are problems with him as well. He likes to fly at moving objects. If I am running down the laneway he will run after me and then fly at me often flapping at my head. Same as when I am biking (once he even stayed on for a ride for a bit). When I am walking he will walk with me (well more like run with me). So I have a cat that will go for walks and a bird that will go for walks as well – who needs a dog?

Mr Grouse also likes our berries and our apple tree. At this time of year there is nothing for him to take but last summer there was a struggle with us getting any berries – he is darn quick that guy and will get out early and pluck through all the berries. The apple tree will soon be strarting to grow buds and I fear Mr Grouse will be plucking them off as fast as they appear.

The cat and bird will both hang out close to us. Occasionally Mojo will make like he is stalking the grouse but in fact he is scared of the bird. Today I was watching as Mojo was getting into that 'ready to spring, stalking position' and was close to grouse. Next thing I knew grouse was chasing the cat! And the cat was scared and running fast. We told grouse off for that one but I really don't believe he understands a darn thing.

Grouse sure doesn't seem to need anything from us but he does enjoy the corn. I tell him to keep the ducks out of the stream (they mess up the water which messes up the filters in the house) in exchange for treats from us. I'd like to think it is working though recently we ran out of bird food so I have fallen behind on my part of the bargain. We shall see how he keeps up with his once the weather gets colder. I did see some ducks the other day but not as many as I have normally seen in the stream. OK I may be dreaming but no harm in that...

She's not gonna do it

I mentioned a bit about Linsy and gymnastics. Well I figured that even though she said she wasn't going to participate that once she got there she would just jump right in. Think again Shera. No way did she have any plans to join the class. I went in with her and she watched a bit but wanted to have nothing to do with them – well almost nothing. She said she'd do the beam. Sure enough when they were on the beam we went in the gym, she did a couple of walks on the beam and then walked right out again.

I am very disappointed that it isn't working out for her. She has enjoyed gymnastics so much. It was also nice that it is something that she and Paco were doing together. They often had fun recreating gym classes at home. I guess home is the only place she will be doing it anymore.

At first I was upset with Linsy. I didn't understand why she was being so adamant about not being in the class. That has faded and now I am just upset that she is missing out on the opportunity. Not upset with her – just upset with the situation...

Do they ever learn?

A while ago Linsy came up to me and asked me to look at her ear. OK looks fine. What's up? Well it turns out that inside there is a little bead – an almost translucent little bead. Yikes! Ya don't put things in your ears. I thought she understood that.

Well further inspection did allow us to see the bead but that is about it. No going in there after it. So a trip to the walk-in clinic in Georgetown, more than an hour wait and seconds later the bead is out. Whew!

She was quite brave throughout the procedure and I am glad it was Linsy rather than Paco – he never would have been able to tolerate such a thing. He was deathly afraid of small offices, doctors and any kind of invasive touch at her age.

Well we sure discussed about what goes in our orifices!

Last week Paco and Linsy came running inside and Paco took a tissue and started wiping at her nose. Well it turns out she had stuck a pea up there!

I don't suppose I was the most balanced with this. I was feeling quite stressed with too many things to do and the thought of taking a few hours out of the day for another trip to the doctors was not at all appealing.

We tried tweezers – the pea was too hard. We asked her to blow but she only sniffed. So I tried suctioning it out – with my mouth. It may have budged but not enough. I had resigned myself to another trip to the doctors office when Thomas suggested another way of blowing it out. He had been looking it up on line and so I plugged the nostril without the pea and blew in her mouth. Took a few tries but the pea did come popping out.

This incident was a bit more traumatic for her – we tried more things and both of us (Thomas and I) were holding her and working together.

I sure hope she has it by now and I'm grateful that there was no real harm done...

Lots of activities

Well, talk about busy. I seem to do this to myself. Some of this I think is my desire not to miss anything. Wanting to be a part of things (and yet I seem to do quite well on just staying on the outside). I see programs or classes and think the kids might be interested and sign us up for all sorts of things.

Right now I put them in swimming lessons on Mondays. Paco is the oldest in his group (not uncommon for him) as he is pretty far away from swimming. Linsy is in the same group but so far for the first class she was quite happy to completely ignore the instructor. As long as I was close by she just enjoyed being in the water and bouncing around, purposefully keeping out of the class dynamics. So we'll see how things progress for both of them.

One reason I put Paco specifically in swimming is because he has carefully evaded any attempts to help him integrate more into the water and get into swimming. Feels kind of sad considering I am geared towards homeschooling and I feel the need to put my child in outside lessons in order for him to learn something. Well I suppose nothing is set in stone and more and more I really see the truth in that. Things are always changing.

On Tuesdays Paco is currently enrolled in an art class. He's not what I would consider artistic but the theme is medieval and I keep hoping he will take after his dad more in this (and in many areas). His dad is artistic and talented in sooo many things.

Tuesday and Thursday evenings, and Saturday mornings Paco has Jujitsu. I am surprised how much he really enjoys this. He looks more like a 'fragile' dancer than a martial arts person as he practices the movements with the rest of the class. I guess the aspect of learning how to fight is very appealing to him. He has been going for a few weeks now and is very keen to go as much as possible (not always able to make 3 classes a week) so we shall see how this continues.

Finally the kids both take gymnastics on Fridays. They both really enjoyed the last semester of it in the spring. So far it is pretty good though there is a new coach and she is not as enthusiastic and engaging as the other one was. She's more laid back and less likely to gently push the kids or even to always be there to assist them. To her credit this is a fairly large class.

The last class there was a little mishap and I am hoping Linsy is willing to look beyond it. The kids sit in front of the trampoline and each have a turn on it. The coach asked if all of the kids had their turn and one little one spoke up that he hadn't. Linsy didn't speak up and the class moved onto the next activity. Linsy was very distraught. Those emotional tears, that sobbing and the real heartbreaking emotion that she was experiencing. She hadn't had a turn on the trampoline. I went in and explained to the coach what had happened and she was apologetic and Linsy had her turn. But she couldn't stop crying.

So Linsy came out with me for a bit and I gently coaxed her back into the classroom. It took quite a while before she would consider participating again and even then I had to be there (parents are not supposed to be in the gym during the classes – observation room only). The coach did come again after the class to apologize to Linsy and explain why she missed her. Linsy is not impressed.

Yesterday I was saying that gymnastics is coming up and Linsy said she is not doing gymnastics anymore. The coach missed her on the trampoline and Linsy is not going to forget it (or forgive apparently). I guess we will see what happens on Friday.

On top of this I have had a few small jobs – one as a program representative at a Home Depot, talking with people about energy saving things they can do in and around their home. A full weekend of work there. I also am doing occasional work as a school crossing guard.

Whew! Just when I think things may calm down a bit (lots of food preparation going on in the summer for the winter months), I create more and more busy-ness in my life. Something there to pay attention to.